My World

It has been so long since I have written, but today I knew it was the day I needed to start writing again. Today I was strongly reminded that Grant and I were absolutely meant to be together.  There is no logical reason as to how we came together.  All that needs to be known is that Heavenly Father wanted us for each other, so He made it happen.  We were two worlds apart (in so many respects.) We have always teased that we had to go halfway across the world to find each other- but I see that Heavenly Father led us to each other. He took a girl from New Mexico, previously going to school at BYU-and a California boy previously going to school in Idaho, and allowed us to be placed in the MTC for a brief time together.  We never met, only he remembers seeing me; yet that is where our side of the adventure began.  He took these two missionaries- using people in each of their lives to allow for an acquaintance. His master plan brought us together.  

 

It did not take long once we met (face to face) to find our future together.  I see that Heavenly Father knew us each individually.  He knows my weaknesses; he knows my strengths.  He knows Grants weaknesses and his strengths.   He knows that together we can be something amazing.   He must have known that Grant would help me want to be a better person.  He must have known that his hugs could and would bring me comfort and healing.  He must have known that he would be patient and understanding.  He must have known that no one else could bring me the joy that Grant has.  He must have known that there was no one else out there better for me…and he provided a way. I thank my Heavenly Father every day for giving me this man.  I pray every day to help me to be a good wife to him, a good mother to his children, and a person he is proud to call his very own.

It is seems almost an impossible beginning.  And though we have our share of bumps along the way, I would not want to share this journey with anyone else.  I am so grateful for Grant: my one and only love-my world!

let me explain

Let me explain part of my rant about my dog.  There are several things that stress me out about her (the whole eating her poop thing grosses me out, but that is not the reason.)  The thing that really got me that day was the fact that she likes to bolt when she is given an inch, and she will not listen to me...that drives me nuts.  But, it was particularly bad on Monday.  The kids had the day off of school and were home with me.  I hopped in the shower to enjoy a few moments of me time.  I was so rudely interrupted by my kids yelling at me that the dog got out and they could not get her back.  She will get in people's back yards, chase anyone she can, and simply get into trouble.  So I hopped out of the shower, threw a towel around my body and ran outside. Sure enough she was gone far from our yard.  I ran down the driveway, barefoot, soaking wet, hair dripping and only half covered with a towel in 20ish degree weather. I am yelling and hollering at the dog, and she is blatently ignoring me.  I turn to my left a see my 60 year old neighbor working in the yard building his get rich quick scheme shed just looking at me like, "looks fun."  It was obvious I needed help and he was not about to jump in.  So I ran inside, threw on something to cover myself to go get the dog.  By then she was following and pestering a walker.  He was about to leave the neighborhood, and so was the dog. The walker was nice enough to stop and allow me time to catch up to the dog.  I still had to chase her for a bit before I got a hold of her.  I did not even drag her back home (but I was not about to let go of her collar cause she would bolt again).  She cried and screamed the whole way home like I was beating her (oh believe me I wanted to!) Instead she just earned herself a stay in her kennel and my frustration. Moments like that are not my idea of fun...but I guess at least my neighbors got a show out of it.  I am just not wired for that much patience I suppose...and that is my story.

At this very moment

At this very moment I hate our dog.  I really do.  I have got to write it down to release some of my stress so Grant does not have to get an earful and feel the need to apologize.  At this point I derive very little pleasure from her.  I try to remind myself she is a puppy and I need to be patient, but she has about zapped all my patience from me.  The horrible side effect of that is now I am way less patient with my kids, and they do not deserve that.  I have enough stress in my life without her sending me over the edge....oh and believe me she does.  Next time I think I want a dog and miss having one around, I need to remember how horrible this has been and really come to terms with the fact that I am just not a pet person...it really is not in me.

Christmas

I do not think it is any secret that I LOVE CHRISTMAS!! There is so much about it that I love, but one of the things is the wonder and excitement of the kids.  I love that they are all believers. (not sure how long that will last-or how long I should let it last) but to be honest I am in no hurry.  Their excitement about Santa is exhilirating!

I am grateful this year I was able to capture all of them with the big man.  Cannot believe it has already come and gone.

Dare I say....

Dare I say that this little boy is potty trained....Oh I dare!!!!!

I anticipate there are still plenty of accidents ahead of us, but this boy is potty trained!!!  He has not worn a diaper all week (not even to bed) and has figured out how to tell me when he needs to go potty (all versions thereof.)  It is so liberating!!!!

The other day Grant and I decided to do the rough math on what we have spent in diapers (mind you this is a rough and pretty low estimate in my opinion.)  Since May 13, 2003 we have had non-stop 1-2 kids in diapers.  (my sil did 3 in diapers all different sizes at one point and I bow down to her for her patience and amazing outlook on it.) So over 9 1/2 years straight we have had someone in diapers..we have purchased diaper, we have changed diapers, and we have thrown away MANY diapers.

So nearly 10 years later our rough guess (and this does not include wipes, pull ups, or swim diapers) we figured we have spent well over $4000!

I am elated for the financial freedom, the freedom from changing messes, and finding myself in the next stage of life.  I am doing a happy dance on my end!!!

Perfectionist

I know it may be hard to believe (especially if you happened to walk into my house right now) but I do have a streak of perfectionism in me!  I have missed out on a lot as a result (drawing, playing pain/violin-anything of the artistic nature) so I try to let go of it to save my sanity.

When I was in college (probably high school too) I would take all my notes in class in pencil.  But that did not look nice enough, so I would always redo them in pen.  It had to look nice, neat and PERFECT.  If I messed up on the third word on the last line, you better believe that I threw that whole paper away and started from the beginning.  I rationalized that I was learning the material as I wrote and rewrote it.  I have to say, anyone that borrowed my notes did not have a problem reading them. (wow computers would have saved me a lot of time..I should have gone to college now and days.)

So how do I transition from expecting perfection from my own notes and handwriting to letting go of my daughters messy and erratic handwriting IT DRIVES ME CRAZY!!!!!! I try really hard to not harp on her and give gentle reminder occasionally...but really I am wondering from where this child came?  Certainly her handwriting did not come from me (or her father for that matter), I just hope that some day she will care enough to write nicely, and if not I will still love her massive amounts!

Stairs and Sleeping bags

Remember when you were a kid and almost anything could be made into a toy and a good time?  Well when the screen time is off and kids find their sleeping bags in conjunction with the stairs...the fun begins!

I have so many pictures with awesome expressions I had to narrow it down to just a few.  I love when the kids 1. play together, 2. laugh together, 3. use their imaginations, 4. be kids!