Better for me

It was one of those days when by the end of the day my patience was short...too short. It looked like Grant was going to be working late so I fed the kids without him and it was about time to be off to FHE. I have to say I had a bad attitude for several reasons.

1. Grant has been working what I refer to as "stupid crazy hours" and for the last several months he has only been home for about 1 or 2 family home evenings. I get tired of doing it all by myself. I am exhausted by that point, and to have to try and control all the kids and teach them at the same time does not always work out in my favor. So I was not exactly jazzed about doing it by myself again.

2. We wanted to do something for a family in our ward, and we were given the name of an older lady who has struggled with some physical limitations. What she needed was some attention and time. Grant and I both thought, "seriously could you have picked a worse family," (meaning Grant and I) right now our time, especially Grant's is sooooo limited. For FHE the plan was to take her a gingerbread house the kids made and let her know we were thinking of her. I was feeling like this was not going to be fun by myself and 5 kids in the home of a person they do not know.

So trying to not doing it begrudgingly, we headed out after dinner. On the way one of the kids made me mad, and I was ready to give up, and stop trying so hard to do everything I know I need to, but feel like I do not have the energy to do by myself. I tried to shake it off, we practiced our song we were going to sing and we went forward.

We got there, the kids were shy, but warmed up super quick. We went into her home, we chatted, and the kids played. Each of the kids, besides Isaac, gave her several hugs. Isaac smiled at her. She called them angels and kept saying how we made her night. She was thrilled and smiled the whole time. My spirits lifted, and it ended up being a great night.

It was one of those experiences where I tried to be of service, but gained so much more than given. I needed tonight, and I learned that pushing through the rough patches brings it's rewards!

Don't Be so Brittani

I have wanted a front load washer and dryer for years...but I never could justify it. Lately my laundry has gotten out of control and takes me FOREVER, so Grant and I have been tossing around the idea of biting the bullet and making the purchase. We called everyone we knew that has one (which incidentally is every single family member except us on both sides) and asked what they had, if they liked them, and what the issues were that they have had. That was months ago. I kind of dropped it, but in the last couple of weeks we started looking again. We went to stores, asked a lot of questions and I finally committed to exactly what I want. Now it was time to sit and wait for a rockin deal.

In the meantime our ice maker on our refrigerator broke. When the repairman was here for that I asked him which ones break down the most so I felt secure in my decision. He proceeded to tell me every reason not to get a front load. He ended with saying the only good thing he has to say about them is they make him money. So, by the end of the day I was talked out of them. I talked with Grant about what he told me and we agreed there were some points he made that simply did not make sense.

So...I started reading about them again and am not thinking I am not ready to give up on the dream of front loads. I called Amy to ask her a question about hers and we talked about it. After a bit she said, "I am going to say this with love, but stop being so....Brittani. Don't second guess yourself and just go for it."

I love that she said that to me, cause it is "SO Brittani!" I am not the best about making decisions when it involves spending money...but I am still not decided so I guess I am Brittani through and through.

Somewhere else

Asher has been having rough days lately. When we first moved he would say I want to go to the other house. We finally broke him of that, but now he just says I want to go somewhere. Last night Jamison took the blue plate and he was beside himself. He was sobbing and being ridiculous. Grant was not home, and not coming home until after church, and I was losing my steam. He would not calm down for anything. I was to the point of wanting to yell at him (but I have been working really hard on not yelling and doing really good, so I did not want to lose it) so when he said I want to go somewhere else I told him to go right ahead, that would be just fine with me. He kept saying it over and over and I finally when I told him again to go, sobbing he looked at me and said, "But I don't even know how to start the car." It might have been just a little bit hard not to laugh!