Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Mourning the Loss

I am mourning the loss of three things and wish I was at a loss for the other:

1. James is back in school, I miss her. I was not ready to send her back into the world and not have her playing downstairs or by my side asking me what she can do next to help. I feel like I just got her back and they are taking her away from me again. Do not get me wrong, I am excited for the learning she is going to be doing, for the socialization she will have, and the independence she will hopefully gain, but I miss my little girl. I thought it would be easier this year, but I feel like it was almost harder, maybe because I knew what was ahead. My mom informed me that it never gets easier, not fair...Though it is such a good thing for the kiddos, it is a hard thing for Mamma.

2. I no longer have a little baby, Mique is officially walking. She falls A LOT, but almost always gets right back up and keeps going. When she gets too excited she topples right over, but when no one is paying attention she can get pretty far. Of coarse crawling is still faster, but she is determined to be a big kid and walks all she can. I no longer have a baby.

3. Caleb started Soccer (T/TH for an hour) and soon James starts dance and I am mourning the loss of my freedom and evenings. I am not sure I am ready for this, but here we go. I have been dreading it with the almost sad knowledge that it only gets worse from here...but it is terribly important for Grant and I to have the kids involved in things...not too much but things none the less. Caleb of coarse loved it! And even though he is kinda short compared to other kids, he had some moments of looking so grown up!

4. I wish I was missing just a few diapers. I have started the path of potty training Asher. He goes at least 1-2 times a day on the toilet and at least that often in his underwear, and the rest in a diaper. He does not totally get it, so I am not making it too stressful for either of us, but I am trying and being a little consistent...we will get there. It might take awhile, but we will get there (my goal is by his b-day.)

Life is changing for us this year, and I just hope I can keep up (I am honestly worried!)

5 comments:

Regina said...

I feel a lot like you do! Life is changing right before my eyes and I can't do anything about it. My kids are growing up way too fast and I feel like I'm not ready to let them go! Good luck with potty training! I'm not looking forward to that with my little J!

brit said...

you totally described exactly how i feel,in 1. 3. and 4. (i just don't have a baby-walking)

Rachel Clare said...

You're going to do great! (I say that while I, myself, am dreading the changes that come with having your oldest in school- we start Tuesday...)

Good luck, and let me know if you have any helpful tips on getting through it all!!

Holly said...

Perfectly said. It doesnt get easier letting them go it gets harder. At least it has for me. I was so sad that Caleb was starting 5th grade and I have been having a hard time letting Aubrie go each morning. I miss them both. Bryn asks everday "When can we get Aubrie?" I have a constant reminder of them being gone all day. How fun that Asher is playing soccer, maybe we will see you guys around. Where is James taking dance?

Kara said...

I'm with you on the school thing. I like change and having my kids grow up, but it is a little sad a the same time.